Feeling sad and lonely during the Christmas season is real. December is a month that can bring immense joy or immense pain. For those struggling with these feelings of pain, this letter from my friend Sam Eaton is for you. During this Christmas season, know that you are loved by your Father in Heaven. For those experiencing joy this Christmas, this letter is for you. During this Christmas season, take moments out of your day to love on those hurting. I love Sam’s suggestion to sit down with a hurting person over a hot cup of coffee and listen to their story.
During the Christmas season, when people are struggling, let’s point them to the one who can heal their souls. The one who came to this earth as a tiny helpless baby so that we could know God personally. Only Jesus can take away pain. Introducing others to Jesus is the best gift we can give people this Christmas.
Enjoy this guest post from Sam!
To the girl sobbing on the train, it’s not often I take public transportation through the beautiful city I call home, but sometimes my secret, Bohemian alter-ego convinces me to go on an adventure. I love to watch the skyscrapers blur past as an anonymous sea of people come and go about their everyday lives; it connects me somehow to this crazy thing we call humanity.
That was my story today as the snow fell gently against the wide, clear glass.
Then I spotted her a few rows ahead of me—eyes puffy and leaking with pain. It seemed life had hit her harder than she ever imagined.
I pulled a pack of Kleenex out of my clearance messenger bag and handed them to her. I asked softly, “are you okay?” She nodded quickly and tried to look busy in her purse.
I said, “it’s gonna be okay,” as I moved back to my seat.
Minutes later the train pulled to the station and she stood to get off. As she walked towards the door, she paused for a moment and our eyes met. The corner of her mouth twinged up ever-so-slightly, and then she was gone.
There were so many things I wanted to say to her in that moment that I’m not sure “are you okay” really conveyed. So I got off at the next stop and chased her down.
Okay that’s a lie…
I did, however, get off at the next stop, walk straight into Caribou Coffee and write her a letter. Writer’s, ya know?
There are so many things I wanted to tell her, wishing with all my might I could save her from her pain. Maybe in some serendipitous universe these words will find her or some other struggling, heartbroken girl who needs to hear them. Here are the words I want every hurting girl to know from a brother who cares.
To the girl sobbing on the train—
I don’t know what’s happened to you.
I don’t know the hurt you hold deep in your heart, in that place you never let anyone see.
I don’t know how you feel when you scroll Instagram and watch endless photos of the girls who seemingly have everything you’ve always dreamed of.
I don’t know what you see in the mirror when all of your makeup is washed away.
I don’t know the dark places you’ve wandered looking for anything that makes you feel alive.
I don’t know the lies that keep you up until that time of night when only the worst infomercials are on.
I don’t know your story.
But I want to. I want to know every part of who you are.
Not in the creepy way that far too many guys do, but like the friend it seems you might need today.
I want to take every ounce of your pain on my shoulders and carry it for you.
I want to sit with you, a cup of hot coffee and hear about the incredible woman you are.
I want to hold you in my arms as this heartbreak streams down your face.
I want to hand you an endless supply of those awkward cooling Kleenex and make you smile through the tears.
I want to look straight into your pupils and tell you that you are beautiful, that you matter, that you are loved.
I want to tell you if you have something in your past you’re not proud of, it doesn’t define you.
I want to pick up all the shattered pieces of your confidence and super glue them back on to your cool, hipster cardigan.
I want to save you from whatever it is that has you sobbing today. I really do, but the truth is I can’t and neither can any guy for that matter.
There is this really cool guy who can though, who’s way better than I’ll ever be. He’s a much better listener (especially while a football game is on) and has way more strength and compassion than me even my most impressive days. He has more care for your well-being in his baby toe than I could ever dream of having.
And he can actually take your pain away.
He can hold you and remind you of the woman who you were created to be, the one you’ve always dreamed of becoming.
He can save you from this dark storm you’ve found yourself in.
You won’t find him on Tinder or eHarmony. You won’t find him in a bar or at the Laundromat. You won’t find him on one knee, holding a rose on a sandy beach while the Hawaiian Breeze blows through your perfectly curled hair.
But find him you can.
And find him you will if you’re brave enough to go looking.
His name is Jesus and despite what everyone says he wants from you, the truth is he just wants to be a part of your life. No expectations or judgment. No tricks or gimmicks. He just wants you. Every stunning, hurting, messy part of you.
He wants to make you whole again (or as close to that as anyone can ever feel this side of heaven).
The best I can offer you is a glimpse of him working in me, but even that will be a mere reflection. I will always fall short, but He never will. He’s not going anywhere.
He’s just waiting for you to open up that journal or sit with him in some silence.
He’s just waiting for you to open your heart just a crack and let him in.
He’s just waiting for you in the dusty pages of that old, enchanting story called the Bible.
He’s just waiting for you to come back and be His again. Like you always have been. And you always will be.
He knows what’s happened to you.
He knows the hurt you hold deep in your heart, in that place you don’t dare let anyone see.
He knows how you feel when you scroll Instagram and see endless photos of the girls who seemingly have everything you’ve always dreamed of.
He knows what you see in the mirror when all of your makeup is washed away.
He knows the dark places you’ve wandered looking for anything that makes you feel alive.
He knows the lies that keep you up until that time of night when only the worst infomercials are on.
He knows your story.
He loves you so much he was nailed to a cross to save you from the darkness and shame this world tries to bury you in.
So while I may have failed you today in the my fumbling of words, my desire to help you comes from him. My compassion for your tears your is God trying to reach you, trying to help.
I dare you to give him a chance. Don’t listen to this world for a second when they tell you that a few drinks, a new boyfriend, new clothes, or anything else will make it all better. It won’t.
But He will.
This Christmas season, give Jesus a chance to show you a way you never dreamed was possible.
Meet Sam: Sam Eaton writes at RecklesslyAlive.com and is a monthly contributor of JP Ministries. Sam’s heart for Jesus is contagious. He’s a music teacher by day, and a youth ministry and worship musician by night. You can friend him on twitter @aliverecklessly.