With a past filled with sexual abuse, promiscuity, and an unhealthy sex education, I lacked a healthy view of sexuality. The biggest lie that I believed was that I was sexually broken.
My view of sex was far from the truth that God promises in His love letter. I had two distorted and conflicting views of sex:
- My experiences taught me that sex is bad and shameful.
- The movies taught me that sex is the best thing this world has to offer.
I can only imagine God’s response to these lies. God created sex as a gift for marriage, but sex is not the best thing this world has to offer. We need to protect and value sex, not place it on a pedestal.
Neither of these views are biblical. The problem is that we base our views off of our experiences and what the media teaches us. In high school and early college, I wanted so badly to be loved and feel beautiful. I turned to sexual acts to meet these needs. I was left disappointed, feeling worse than before. It wasn’t until I had a relationship with Jesus that I finally began to feel loved and beautiful. (Read my story here.)
Once I became a follower of Jesus, I learned God’s true purpose for sex. However, I was so broken and hurting that I doubted God could restore my sexuality.
In order to experience the sexual wholeness that God promises, we need sexual healing and a healthy theology of sex.(Tweet this.)
You are never too far gone for God to give you an extreme makeover sexually. God can free you from the chains of shame.
3 ways God heals us sexually:
Jeremiah 31:3-4: “The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. I will build you up again, and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt. Again you will take up your timbrels and go out to dance with the joyful.”
In this passage, God reassures Israel that He will restore her. The Israelites had been living in turmoil and exile, but God promised to rebuild His nation. Have you lived in turmoil because of sexual abuse or the pain caused by sexual sin? Have you lived in exile because of shame? God promised to rebuild Israel and He promises to rebuild you.
God promises this because of His everlasting love and unfailing kindness. When you experience restoration, there will be joy. Just like Israel, you will take up your tambourines and dance with joy. The restoration process is long and dreary, but have hope in the joy that is to come.
To find healing from sexual shame, we must rebuild. We must bring to light all the pain we’ve experienced. This process takes time. Imagine how long it would have taken God to rebuild a nation. It takes God time to rebuild our sexuality, but it is possible. You can become sexually whole. I encourage you to write down your sexual turmoil and talk through it with a trusted Christian counselor.
Psalm 103:4: “who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.”
In order to experience freedom from sexual shame, we must confess our sins to God. In this Psalm, David praises God for His many mercies, including forgiveness from sexual sin. When we confess our sins to God, He redeems our lives form the pit of hell. God doesn’t want us to stay in the pit, living in sexual sin. He want us to experience sexual wholeness.
1 Peter 5:10: “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”
In this passage, Peter encourages his readers to endure suffering so that God’s grace would be manifest in their lives. Peter is saying that suffering will only last a little while, while glory in Christ will be eternal. We are strangers to this world, waiting to go home to be with Jesus. While we are here, we will suffer and experience the result of living in a fallen world. Even our sexuality has been impacted by sin. One day, our sexuality will be restored to God’s original design. One day we will get to go back to Eden and be naked and unashamed. Until that day, I encourage you to remain hopeful and pursue healing and restoration.
God used my brokenness to turn me to Him. I learned that God’s love was different from every other love I had experienced, and that only through a personal relationship with Jesus could I find complete satisfaction and the love I was searching for. God’s love is satisfying, saving, and constantly pursuing! God rejoices over me with gladness, quiets my heart by His love, and exults over me with loud singing (Zephaniah 3:17). God’s love is more powerful than any prince charming!
God’s love healed me from sexual shame.
Have you experienced sexual abuse and are living enchained to shame? Allow Jesus to set you free. Find out how you can begin a personal relationship with him today.
Remember, YOU ARE LOVED.