Let’s discuss Christian sexuality, because the Church has failed in this area. Instead of living in freedom, Christian women are hiding in shame. Instead of talking about sex, Christian women are putting their sexuality in a box under their beds.
Recently, I met one Christian woman in her thirties who shared that she had a box of lingerie tucked away under her bed. She shared that she’d been buying cute underwear and bras for years. Every sale, she added another to her collection. Hoping that one day, she would have a husband to share them with.
Her story left me questioning:
Will a husband fill her longing to be loved? What if she never gets married?
How far can my boyfriend and I go physically before it becomes a sin?
Christians ask this question all the time, so if you are asking this, you are not alone. You are normal and your desires are normal. Being physically attracted to your significant other is a good thing. If you weren’t physically attracted, I would recommend you break up. Our challenge then becomes, what do we do with these desires?
Our churches are filled with conflicting beliefs. Some Christians believe kissing is okay. Others argue you shouldn’t kiss until your wedding day. Some Christians think that everything but vaginal sex is okay. Others argue that sex includes more than vaginal sex. What do we do with these contradictions?
In this post, I will answer ‘How Far is Too Far,’ share some personal stories, and provide some practical tips to live out purity in dating. (more…)
Happy Easter week friends! Today my friend Allison Finley from Divinely Beautiful Ministries is guest posting about the pursuit of real and lasting beauty. At the end of her post, we are giving away a FREE signed copy of her new book, Divinely Beautiful. We are praying that your identity would come from the Words of God instead of the words of the world.
Jesus loves people who watch porn. Jesus even loves porn stars. Yes, Jesus loves both of these groups of people. No matter what, His love for them will never change. Why is this? Because Jesus came to save the broken, the lost, and the hurting.
While on earth, Jesus spent most of His time with lost, broken people. In Matthew 9:12-13, Jesus states, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: I desire mercy, not sacrifice. For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Spiritually healthy people don’t understand that they are sick, sinful, and in need of a Savior. But the sick, they line up outside of the doctor’s office hoping for something to heal the pain. Do you realize that you are sick and in need of a savior? Maybe you are immune to the hurting in your heart. Maybe you think these feelings are normal. Maybe you actually think you are spiritually healthy. (more…)
Addicted to pornography? Desiring freedom but feeling alone? Looking for a new devotional? If you answered yes to any of these questions, this new and FREE resource is for you. This inspiring reading plan on Bible.com is for women that struggle with pornography and seek FREEDOM. God has created each of us with a desire for intimacy. We often seek to satisfy those feelings with fantasy and pornography that leave us feeling guilty, empty, worthless, and trapped in a vicious cycle. This cycle of sin robs us of the joy and freedom we were designed to live in. (more…)
In the midst of the guilt, shame and pain of sexual sins, painful thoughts fill my mind, “I can’t believe I sinned… again. Does God hate me for my addictions? Will I ever find freedom?”
If you are struggling with sexual sin today, I’ve been in your shoes. I’ve spent a lot of time talking about finding freedom from sexual sin and the importance of fighting for purity on the blog, but I haven’t spent enough time talking about grace.
To help you better understand grace, here are a few definitions.
Grace is the beauty of following Christ.
Grace is unmerited favor.
Grace is God loving us when we don’t deserve it.
Grace is God’s riches at Christ’s expense.
Grace is the divine means by which God makes Himself everything we need.
When we mess up, God gives us grace. When we feel shameful and defeated, God gives us grace. When we hide from Him, God gives us grace.
Just like Adam and Eve who hid behind fig leaves after they sinned, we run, hide, and build our own fig leaves. What fig leaves are you hiding behind? (more…)
In four months I can freely have sex with my husband whenever we want, but for now, we can’t. We’re engaged and waiting. Deciding to honor God in purity, my fiancé and I are refraining from experiencing sexual intimacy. This isn’t easy. In fact, waiting is hard.
We’ve messed up and have pushed the boundaries further than we’ve wanted to, but we still have yet to have sex. And each time we realize we are pushing the line, we re-evaluate. We re-check our physical boundaries. We re-ask each other this question:
Why are we fighting for purity?
If we don’t know why we are fighting, we will stop fighting. If we don’t see the value of purity, we will never guard it. (What does the Bible say about purity?) Beth Moore explains this perfectly in her new study, Entrusted, “We won’t effectively guard what we don’t highly esteem.”
Do you have high esteem for purity? Do you want to live a life marked by obedience to God? (more…)
Five years ago I thought I would never heal from the rape I experienced my freshman year of college. My nights were filled with tears and my days were filled with doubts. Why did this happen? Does God allow rape? (Check out the answer to this question on Bible.com.)
With countless unanswered questions and tears in my eyes, I surrendered my life to Jesus. I still doubted that he could heal me, but I believed I needed a Savior. On my own, I would never find healing. My heart was a wreck and I needed Jesus to give me a new one.
Maybe you, just like me, often wonder, is healing even possible? How do I find healing? Could Jesus really heal me from the pain of sexual abuse? Let me share one important truth with you… (more…)
Have you ever wondered if God allows rape?
As a victim of rape, I thought the rape was my fault. I did not fully understand that I was experiencing the result of sin until years later. No matter the reason for the rape, it still wounded me deeply. Because of my hurt and pain, I often wondered why God would allow His children to suffer.
During the months following my abuse, God felt closer than ever before. He never moved. When I cried out in agony, He was by my side. When I prayed with tears streaming down my cheeks, He was there. When I begged Him to take away the pain, He held my hand.
He was there.
Right beside me, holding my hand, and helping me find healing. He was there and He knew this would happen…
Click to read my whole guest post on Bible.org.
Do you believe that your story is powerful?
Maybe you were saved at a young age and you fear your story isn’t as powerful as others. Or maybe just like me, you struggle believing that God could use your broken past for his good. I want to share with you that no matter your story, it’s powerful.
My story began in college when Christ softened my heart through a horrible experience. God had been pursuing me all my life, but it wasn’t until college that I finally realized my need for a Savior.
During my freshman year of college, on day three, I was date raped. I became depressed, I lived in shame, and I hated my life. But God pursued me. God used rape to bring me to my knees and allow me to see my need for a Savior. That year I was beginning to experience a love that I had never felt. My freshman year of college I became a follower of Christ, but it would take years for me to start sharing my story with other women.
At the end of this post, I will share with you one example of how God used my story in a powerful way. For now, I want to dive into a passage that talks about how our stories are powerful. (more…)