Desiring to feel loved and beautiful, I downloaded Tinder and uploaded my cutest selfie. Sick of being single and waiting on God’s perfect timing, I wanted to take things into my own hands. I wanted control over my dating life.
Impatient and not trusting God, I began the quest for a man. Swiping right if I found him attractive and left if he was too creepy, I was making every decision based on looks. During this season in college, I was a believer and truly loved God, but I lacked intimacy with Him.
Instead of growing in intimacy with God, I wanted instant intimacy.
I believed that instant intimacy was only found in the love of a man, so in that moment, when he swiped right too and we were a match, I felt desired. This feeling didn’t last. Instead of believing what God says is true about me, I believed I was unloved and ugly. Yet, I kept on swiping and searching for intimacy.
Have you ever sought out intimacy, yet remained unsatisfied? (more…)
“You’ll never find a man to marry who isn’t a virgin!” said a friend to me, Joy, many years ago. I remember thinking, “Why should I wait if he’s not going to wait?” Well ladies, there are men who will be virgins on their wedding night. There are men who value God’s Word and desire to live out purity in singleness and marriage. Sam Eaton is one of those men.
Check out his guest post: Saving Sex for Marriage | From a Guy’s Perspective
Love, Joy (more…)
It’s easy to be angry at the people we sin sexually with. It is easy to blame them. We might think, ‘they pushed me further than I would have gone.’ This might be true, but we still are at fault. Our sexual sins hurt God, hurt ourselves, and they hurt others. We must come to God in prayer asking Him for forgiveness. (more…)
Readers often ask us questions about relationships, specifically Christian romantic relationships. Women want to know how to find a godly man, what godly men look for in a girlfriend, and lots more. Today four Christian men answer questions about their significant other. Among the four, one is dating, two are engaged, and one is married. Let’s check out their answers! (more…)
I recently got engaged to a godly Christian man. Let me share with you our proposal story. Zack and I were back at his apartment after a night of two-stepping. That morning I had landed in Dallas after being away for a few weeks. When I got home from the airport Zack had given me roses and showed me a puzzle that he completed as a surprise.
Zack knows I love puzzles. In fact, growing up my Dad called me the Puzzle Queen. Months before Zack proposed, Zack had ordered this personalized puzzle online and completed the whole puzzle by himself (a big task for a non puzzle queen). After finishing it, he flipped it over and wrote a secret message that I wouldn’t see for months. (more…)
“Joy, you are so vulnerable and so brave. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I could never be as bold as you to freely talk about these issues.” – Women’s Minister
That was the response I got from a women’s minister as I talked about the growing epidemic of porn addiction for women. Throughout my talk I shared how in 5th grade a friend first introduced me to porn, opening doors of curiosity inside my 11 year old brain. Next, I shared my story of date rape, which led me to turn back to porn out of more curiosity about sex.
In my talk, I was authentic, vulnerable, and bold – characteristics missing from many women’s ministries. If we as women’s ministers are not authentic, vulnerable, and bold, then neither will our women be authentic, vulnerable, and bold. As a millennial, I look for those characteristics in a church and a women’s ministry. Are you afraid of being vulnerable, authentic, and bold with the women you are ministering to? (more…)
I’ve been there. I was a college freshman who was lost searching for what would give me an identity. What would give me hope. What would make me feel loved. As a college student, one desires to fit in and find her place and to meet a guy.
At least, that is what I wanted. (more…)
You may think I’m crazy. You might think that what I’m about to say is not relevant in today’s world. Hear me out. In high school, I was not planning on waiting until marriage, I just hoped I found a guy I loved. This all changed when I fell in love with God. Now, I want to honor God and give Him all the glory in my current relationship, so I plan on waiting to have sex until my wedding night.
The Bible calls us to be pure and avoid sexual immorality. This is 100% different from the world, but remember that Jesus warns us that we will look different.
I’ve heard a few myths from readers and friends on why they don’t think a couple should wait until their wedding night to have sex. Let me share these myths with you and explain why I think they are myths. (more…)
We can’t imagine a life without sin, pain, shame, death, loss, grief, tears, etc. The list can go on and on. Our only experience with life is living in a sin cursed world. We’ve never known a life without these things, yet God promises that one day we can experience a new life if we trust in Jesus.
As the news unfolds of tragedy after tragedy, how do we believers hold on to this promise? (more…)
The moment of temptation right before you sin happens in a matter of seconds. The enemy wants you to sin. He wants victory over your life. The good news is that God has promised us that no temptation is too big or too strong for us to conquer. In this post, I hope to provide practical tips and encouragement through Scripture to help you become more like Jesus, fight temptation, and experience freedom. (more…)